Cast/Baradri System In Islam????

[Alina]

Salam Fbians...
Jesa k sab jantay hain k hamari society main Aisay buhat se log hain jo Apni Cast ko buhat Aala samajhtay hain Aur dosri Cast main ussi tarah uthtay bethtay hain jesay non muslims main uthtay bethtay hain.....Per jahan cast ki baat aa jaye tu Musalmaan Musalmaan ki apas main Behas ho jati hai Baaz ooqat baat qatal tak pohach jati hai...

Question mera Yeh hai k Aap log kia Samajay hain Iss Cast/Baradri System k baaray main???
Meri tamam Fbians se guzarish hai k plzzz apni Raaye ka yahan khul k izhar karain.....!!

+1 EXP

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[Alina]

jee aur main ney bhi ye baat nahi ki ki parents k intention ghalat hotey hein ya wo jaan boojh ker bachchon ko takleef detay hein .... (thou aisi bhi misaal hoti hey ki parents jaantey hein ki unkey faisley sey unka bachcha takleef mey hey aur ye k uski pasand qabil-e-tareef bhi hey per wohi so-called biraadri system n all that unkey aarey aajata jisey wo apni ya apni biraadri ki waja sey nahi chhor saktey) ........

I meant ki zaroori nahi k her baar agar bachhon k khud k faisley aur parents k faisley ko compare karein tu hamesha parents ka faisla behtar ... Cz i believe koee bhi doosra shakhs kabhi bhi ye baat aap sey behtar nahi jaan sakta jab ko ko pata ho k aap ki khushi kis mey hey .... Logon ko parakhney aur zindagi ki unch neech ko jaanney k leye jo tajraba chahiyey hota hey wo parents k paas zeyada in general ... Per phir bhi hum mey sey bohat sey naee nasal k log bhi itney mature hotey hein ki wo bhi her baat ko soch samajh k hi koee faisla kertey hein aur wo sirf jazbaati faisla nahi hota ...
So jaaney unjaaney mey parents ghalati ker jaatey hein jab apna faisla bachchey ki pasand k khilaaf us pey musaalt kertey hein

i have a czn jis ney pasand ki shaadi ki aur kaafi i wud say jadd-o-jahad k baad ... His parents weren't agree especially my khala jo k uski shaadi k din tak ya shayed us key baad bhi kaafi naraz .. Chup .. Koee participation nahi waisi jaisi aik maan kerti hey .. Bas sab k samjhaney pey raazi hogaein thein ... N everyone was feeling bad for her as well as for the couple ... Jitney tense wo dono they apni shaadi jaisey ahum mauqey pey us sey koee bhi andaza laga sakta k wo sab kuch paa k bhi khush nahi ....

Khair later the one daughter in law who was my khala's pasand n total arrange marriage (elder czn) us k saath conflict .. N maamla alehda rehnay pey end hua aur ab wo beta betay jaisey nahi ... Jab ki this czn says always ki i can't leave my parents ... Aik dafa unki baat nahi maani me ney aur unko koee takleef denay ka soch bhi nahi sakta n they all alhamdolilah living together with a good bond with each other. So agar parents bhi thoda dil bada ker lein tu koee itna ghalat faisla bhi ya ghalat output bhi nahi aata saamney ... Baqi yea aulaad honey k naatey hamara tu farz hey hi unka ehtraam kerna .. Is sey tu koee ikhtelaaf hi nahi : )

rahi baat adjust honey ki ... Tu meri muraad sirf life partner sey muhabbat nahi ... I don't believe ki koee shakhs kisi sey muhabbat ka dawa kaisey ker sakta hey jab tak ki usey uskey ahum rishtoon sey zara bhi muhabbat na ho!! ....... Life partner sey tu muhabbat ho hi jaati aur her koee hi kerta ... Ahum cheez ki ye muhabbat family k saath n vice versa bhi hey k nahi ... Agar aik ladki aisey ghar mey jaati jahan sab usey muhabbat kertey hon tu ab bhi main yehi kahoon gee k koee cheez itni mushkil nahi chahey rehan sehan kitney hi mukhtalif ... Chahey apney ghar kuch na kiya ho ladki ney aur susral mey poori zimmedaari n all that .......... Piyaar hota hey tu insan automatically aik doosrey (yani sab ghar waley) ki pasand mey dhal jaata ... Piyaar na ho tu mamooli si cheezien bhi tension ka baes ...

No doubt kehna asaan hota hey ... Per i believe it too ... E.g i wud not like to get married to someone whose family won't like me much even if i like/love that person ... Bcz i know if am going to live with his family and if i won't get love from them or won't love them, then it will eventually create problems b/w me n my partner not matter how deeply we wud in love with each other.
Thats why i said so : ) ......... Ye sirf zabani jama kharch nahi tha ki laffazzi ker rahi main yahan : ) u know

aur kehtey hein na muhabbat apni jagah khud bana leti hey ... I know it must be hard ki koee aap ko na pasnad kerta ho phir bhi aap sabar sey kaam letey huey uskey saath behtar rahein usey muhabbat karein ... Per bas i feel ki agar hum aisa ker lein tu dilon mey jagah zaroor bana saktey hein kisi k bhi chahey kitna hi na pasnad wo shakhs shuru mey hamey kerta ho ... Baqi as i said exceptions r always there ... N fate plays a vital role too n at times we can't do n get any better no matter how hard we try

100% agreed

[AQN]

100% agreed

thankss Alina ........

waisey itni lambi kahani ka itna short n precise reply dekh k wo aik saying yaad aagaee : ) .... n its true k;
kisi ney kaha tha;
"I can't learn anything from the person who agrees with me"

u know wo hota hey na insan k ander aik urge hoti hey apni raey denay ki even agar wo kisi sey agree bhi kerta ho (jaisey me myself) ... tu bohat kam log hotey jo shayed itney sabar waley hotey hein : ) ... I mean meri nazar mey ye sabar hi hey ... jaisey aap khamosh rahein
waisey am learning to be this way at times

+1 EXP

[Alina]

AQN....Main tu Apnay Replies Day Day kar thak gaee...=)
Ager mera opinion dekhna hai...tu aap mere Replies parh saktii hain....!!
Aap ki aur meri raaye main ziyada farq nahi tha....!!
Aur jo thora farq tha....Uss per main Aap se agree hui...!!

+1 EXP

[AQN]

AQN....Main tu Apnay Replies Day Day kar thak gaee...=)
Ager mera opinion dekhna hai...tu aap mere Replies parh saktii hain....!!
Aap ki aur meri raaye main ziyada farq nahi tha....!!
Aur jo thora farq tha....Uss per main Aap se agree hui...!!

arey nahi ... I didn't mean it ...aisey hi lightly kaha ... just like that

werna kaafi kuch padh chuki hoon aap ka .. n waqee itna likha hey aap ney .. itna kuch keh chuki sab ki baat k response mey .. tu I understand k jahan agree kiya tu wahan mazeed kuch kehna itna zaroori nahi so dil nahi kiya ... ye bhi aik sabar aazma kaam hey is tarah long discussions mey reply kerna

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[Alina]

Iss Main Sabar karnay ki Baat Kahan hai...Ager kisi ne koi point of view diya hai....tu zaroori nahi uss main tanqeed nikali jaye....!!
Aur Tanqeed main tab karo gi...jab mujhay lagay ga k aap ki Post main kuch kami thi...Jesay main ne Baqi posts main sab ki baaton main kuch add kiya....!!
Aur jo quote aap ne parha hai...Wo un logon per suit karta hai jo Discussions main Participate nahi kartay...Aur ager aap uss quote per ghaur karain...tu wo ik aisay insan k liye hai jis ka koi opinion hi nahi....!!
Shayed aap ne wo quote sahi se samjha nahi...!!

+1 EXP

[AQN]

Iss Main Sabar karnay ki Baat Kahan hai...Ager kisi ne koi point of view diya hai....tu zaroori nahi uss main tanqeed nikali jaye....!!
Aur Tanqeed main tab karo gi...jab mujhay lagay ga k aap ki Post main kuch kami thi...Jesay main ne Baqi posts main sab ki baaton main kuch add kiya....!!
Aur jo quote aap ne parha hai...Wo un logon per suit karta hai jo Discussions main Participate nahi kartay...Aur ager aap uss quote per ghaur karain...tu wo ik aisay insan k liye hai jis ka koi opinion hi nahi....!!
Shayed aap ne wo quote sahi se samjha nahi...!!

chalein khair ... shayed main apni baat sahi samjha nahi paa rahi aap ko ... so rehney dein

sabar sey muraad ki yun her aik ko tassali bakhsh jawaab dena ... sabar kernay sey hamesha ye thodi na matlab nikalta ki ghussa aaraha ho aur banda sabar ker ley : )

rahi baat quote ki ... tu wohi baat ki shayed abhi we 2 r not at same page : ) .... quote mey jo baat ki gaee wo sirf us sense mey ki jab hum kisi sey ya koee hum sey disagreement kerta hey tu wo apni raey deta hey .. apna point of view hamey dikhata hey ... aur hum apna ...

is tarah hamey us cheez k doosrey pehlo pey nazar daalney ka mauqa milta hey ... doosrey angle sey wo cheez dekhtey hein jab koee banda koee aisey point ki taraf eeshara kerta ... phir hum apni baat us pey wazeh kertey hein and vice versa ... phir koee aik end point pey muttafiq .. ya keh lein ki agley ko convince ... tu ye seekhna huwa na!

baqi I didn't mean to argue with u over something : ) ... aik baat mind mey aagee thi so share ker lee

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[Alina]

chalein khair ... shayed main apni baat sahi samjha nahi paa rahi aap ko ... so rehney dein

sabar sey muraad ki yun her aik ko tassali bakhsh jawaab dena ... sabar kernay sey hamesha ye thodi na matlab nikalta ki ghussa aaraha ho aur banda sabar ker ley : )

rahi baat quote ki ... tu wohi baat ki shayed abhi we 2 r not at same page : ) .... quote mey jo baat ki gaee wo sirf us sense mey ki jab hum kisi sey ya koee hum sey disagreement kerta hey tu wo apni raey deta hey .. apna point of view hamey dikhata hey ... aur hum apna ...

is tarah hamey us cheez k doosrey pehlo pey nazar daalney ka mauqa milta hey ... doosrey angle sey wo cheez dekhtey hein jab koee banda koee aisey point ki taraf eeshara kerta ... phir hum apni baat us pey wazeh kertey hein and vice versa ... phir koee aik end point pey muttafiq .. ya keh lein ki agley ko convince ... tu ye seekhna huwa na!

baqi I didn't mean to argue with u over something : ) ... aik baat mind mey aagee thi so share ker lee

thanks for sharing....Main ne aap ki baat ko samjha issi liye aap ki quotation ko explain kia....Tasveer k 2 rukh hotay hain....May be aap ne quote kisi aur sense main kaha ho...Main ne uss ka dosra rukh bhi aap per Wazeh kar diya...!!
Sabar ka i think posts se koi taluq nahi...Yahan koi muqadma thori na ho raha hai k koi iss main Kamiyaab ho jaye tu Next banda Sabar karay=P
Main apnay opinion ko mukhtalif pehloun se define kar chuki hon....Jin logon ko apnay mouqaf main kuch add karna hoga wo zaroori nahi k last posts hi parhay...Infact wo log shuru se hi Parhay gay...Aur end tak parhay gay....soo meri posts main unhe buhat se points nazar aayein gay...then ap ki post jab parhay gay tu taqreeban wohi points millay gay unhe=)
Ab aap ka aur mera point of view same hai....tu main aap ko kiss chez main convience karon??....Caste Or baradri system k dono mukhalif hain....Dono same baat keh rahay hain k hamaray Parents ko Eduacate hona chahiye....Aur un ka faisla hamesha Athentic hona zaroori nahi....Marriages main Parents ko convience karnay k haami hain....etc etc...!!
Jab apna mauqaff bayan karain tu usay 100% durust samajh kar bayan karain...Warna aap Kabhi khud se satisfy nahi hon gi....=)
Han lekin jab aap se koi disagree karay tu uss time apnay opinion aur uss k opinion main Comparision karain....Warna aap Apni Islah nahi kar paayein gi...!!=)

+2 EXP

[Heer_Malik]

jee aur main ney bhi ye baat nahi ki ki parents k intention ghalat hotey hein ya wo jaan boojh ker bachchon ko takleef detay hein .... (thou aisi bhi misaal hoti hey ki parents jaantey hein ki unkey faisley sey unka bachcha takleef mey hey aur ye k uski pasand qabil-e-tareef bhi hey per wohi so-called biraadri system n all that unkey aarey aajata jisey wo apni ya apni biraadri ki waja sey nahi chhor saktey) ........

I meant ki zaroori nahi k her baar agar bachhon k khud k faisley aur parents k faisley ko compare karein tu hamesha parents ka faisla behtar ... cz I believe koee bhi doosra shakhs kabhi bhi ye baat aap sey behtar nahi jaan sakta jab ko ko pata ho k aap ki khushi kis mey hey .... logon ko parakhney aur zindagi ki unch neech ko jaanney k leye jo tajraba chahiyey hota hey wo parents k paas zeyada in general ... per phir bhi hum mey sey bohat sey naee nasal k log bhi itney mature hotey hein ki wo bhi her baat ko soch samajh k hi koee faisla kertey hein aur wo sirf jazbaati faisla nahi hota ...
so jaaney unjaaney mey parents ghalati ker jaatey hein jab apna faisla bachchey ki pasand k khilaaf us pey musaalt kertey hein

I have a czn jis ney pasand ki shaadi ki aur kaafi I wud say Jadd-o-Jahad k baad ... his parents weren't agree especially my khala jo k uski shaadi k din tak ya shayed us key baad bhi kaafi naraz .. chup .. koee participation nahi waisi jaisi aik maan kerti hey .. bas sab k samjhaney pey raazi hogaein thein ... n everyone was feeling bad for her as well as for the couple ... jitney tense wo dono they apni shaadi jaisey ahum mauqey pey us sey koee bhi andaza laga sakta k wo sab kuch paa k bhi khush nahi ....

khair later the one daughter in law who was my khala's pasand n total arrange marriage (elder czn) us k saath conflict .. n maamla alehda rehnay pey end hua aur ab wo beta betay jaisey nahi ... jab ki this czn says always ki I can't leave my parents ... aik dafa unki baat nahi maani me ney aur unko koee takleef denay ka soch bhi nahi sakta n they all ALHAMDOLILAH living together with a good bond with each other. so agar parents bhi thoda dil bada ker lein tu koee itna ghalat faisla bhi ya ghalat output bhi nahi aata saamney ... baqi yea aulaad honey k naatey hamara tu farz hey hi unka ehtraam kerna .. is sey tu koee ikhtelaaf hi nahi : )

rahi baat adjust honey ki ... tu meri muraad sirf life partner sey muhabbat nahi ... I don't believe ki koee shakhs kisi sey muhabbat ka dawa kaisey ker sakta hey jab tak ki usey uskey ahum rishtoon sey zara bhi muhabbat na ho!! ....... life partner sey tu muhabbat ho hi jaati aur her koee hi kerta ... ahum cheez ki ye muhabbat family k saath n vice versa bhi hey k nahi ... agar aik ladki aisey ghar mey jaati jahan sab usey muhabbat kertey hon tu ab bhi main yehi kahoon gee k koee cheez itni mushkil nahi chahey rehan sehan kitney hi mukhtalif ... chahey apney ghar kuch na kiya ho ladki ney aur susral mey poori zimmedaari n all that .......... piyaar hota hey tu insan automatically aik doosrey (yani sab ghar waley) ki pasand mey dhal jaata ... piyaar na ho tu mamooli si cheezien bhi tension ka baes ...

no doubt kehna asaan hota hey ... per I believe it too ... e.g I wud not like to get married to someone whose family won't like me much even if I like/love that person ... bcz I know if am going to live with his family and if I won't get love from them or won't love them, then it will eventually create problems b/w me n my partner not matter how deeply we wud in love with each other.
thats why I said so : ) ......... ye sirf zabani jama kharch nahi tha ki laffazzi ker rahi main yahan : ) u know

aur kehtey hein na muhabbat apni jagah khud bana leti hey ... I know it must be hard ki koee aap ko na pasnad kerta ho phir bhi aap sabar sey kaam letey huey uskey saath behtar rahein usey muhabbat karein ... per bas I feel ki agar hum aisa ker lein tu dilon mey jagah zaroor bana saktey hein kisi k bhi chahey kitna hi na pasnad wo shakhs shuru mey hamey kerta ho ... baqi as I said exceptions r always there ... n fate plays a vital role too n at times we can't do n get any better no matter how hard we try

Well app nay bilkul sahi kaha.... and i really agree with ur point "I wud not like to get married to someone whose family won't like me much even if I like/love that person"

jaisay app yeh samjh rahi hain, is tarah har koi mature nahi hota, balkay main nay tau ab tak koi case mature nahi dekha, sab bus paglon ki tarah mukalifat kar rahay hotay hain k parents ghalat hain, .....

jahan parents ghalat hn i have been through such situation.... per wahan bhi jeet baharhaal parents ki hi hoi.....

well i guess it truely and completly depnds on one's fate....some times i think k shayed yeh sach hay k "joray asman pr bantay hain"

"Zameen Pay Zaichay Kehtay Rahay Kuch Aur Mujhay
Wo Asman Pay Sitaray Mere Badalta Raha"....

+1 EXP

[AQN]

thanks for sharing....Main ne aap ki baat ko samjha issi liye aap ki quotation ko explain kia....Tasveer k 2 rukh hotay hain....May be aap ne quote kisi aur sense main kaha ho...Main ne uss ka dosra rukh bhi aap per Wazeh kar diya...!!
Sabar ka i think posts se koi taluq nahi...Yahan koi muqadma thori na ho raha hai k koi iss main Kamiyaab ho jaye tu Next banda Sabar karay=P
Main apnay opinion ko mukhtalif pehloun se define kar chuki hon....Jin logon ko apnay mouqaf main kuch add karna hoga wo zaroori nahi k last posts hi parhay...Infact wo log shuru se hi Parhay gay...Aur end tak parhay gay....soo meri posts main unhe buhat se points nazar aayein gay...then ap ki post jab parhay gay tu taqreeban wohi points millay gay unhe=)
Ab aap ka aur mera point of view same hai....tu main aap ko kiss chez main convience karon??....Caste Or baradri system k dono mukhalif hain....Dono same baat keh rahay hain k hamaray Parents ko Eduacate hona chahiye....Aur un ka faisla hamesha Athentic hona zaroori nahi....Marriages main Parents ko convience karnay k haami hain....etc etc...!!

per aap ki nazar mey tu wo baat (quotation) kehnay waley ki apni koee opinion hi nahi (as u said earlier) : ) ... n thts amusing in a way k jis bandey ko dunya maan chuki ho .. jis ki wo baat logon ki nazar mey Golden Words hon uskey leye aap aisi baat kahein ... disagreement kerna aur cheez hey aur judgmental hona aur cheez : )

aur jahan tak meri na cheez aqal hey us qoute ka main pehloo yehi hey ki Disagreement opens new doors to explore the other aspects of that thing ... to see it from other angles ...

anyway ... main phir kahoon gee k main ney Next bandey k hawaley sey sabar ki baat nahi kee thi ... 'Sabar Aazma' aik term hoti hey jo insan apney kisi mushkil kaam k leye bhi use ker sakta ... jaisey agar main ney yahan itni saari itni long discussion kee huee hoti tu I say ki itni himmat aur sabar sey itna reply kiya main ney ... tu usi sense mey aap ko kaha ..

per chalein aap ki nazar mey sirf khuch haar jaaney pey sabar hi hey tu main apney alfaaz wapas leti hoon ...

aur na hi main ney ye kaha ki aap mujhey convince karein ... I know u agreed with me so there's left nothing to convince ... isi leye tu wo quote yaad aaee thi ... baat pata nahi kahan ki kahan chali gaee : )

haa'n agar u mean to say ki main ney Bila Waja itni lambi post kee jab ki aap wo saari baatein keh chukein thein shuru sey ley ker aakhir tak ki posts mey ... tu yea that's my lacking cz mujh mey nahi tha itna sabar : ) ki her aik ka detailed reply padhon ...

thoda bohat her aik ki baat padhi taakey uska scool of thought jaan sakoo'n ... Heer ki baat mey kuch aisa tha jis sey disagree kerti thi tu unki baat k response mey yahan reply ker diya ... aur bas : )

+3 EXP

[AQN]

Jab apna mauqaff bayan karain tu usay 100% durust samajh kar bayan karain...Warna aap Kabhi khud se satisfy nahi hon gi....=)
Han lekin jab aap se koi disagree karay tu uss time apnay opinion aur uss k opinion main Comparision karain....Warna aap Apni Islah nahi kar paayein gi...!!=)

Here I have a disagreement .... aap ki khud ki hi baat aik doosrey k contradictory hey ...

agar her koee apney mauqqaf ko 100% durust samajh k beyaan karey ga tu who on earth will listen to others ... there never be any afterward Agreement b/w people .... only clashes

jo shakhs khud ko 100% dursut samajh k baat kerta hey wo kabhi bhi doosron k nazaryey ko samajhney k leye flexible nahi hota ... open nahi hota ki is baat ka koee aur pehlo bhi hosakta hey .. aur log bhi Durust hosaktey hein

apney opion n doosrey k opinion ko compare kernay k leye zaroori hey ki jab bhi aap koee baat karein tu ye soch k karein ki shayed log agree na karein meri baat sey ... shayed koee aur isey kisi aur tareeqay sey dekhey ga ... this is something which helps us to understand people

werna jo log khud ko hamesha Mr./Ms. Right samajh k baat kertey hein tu phir logon ki unkey baarey mey kiya raaey hoti hey shayed uska ilm nahi aap ko : ) ... so mera tu mukhlisaana mashwara yehi hey ki jab bhi koee baat karein tu flexible ho key karein ki agley bandey ki bhi aik Soch hey bilkul usi tarah jis tarah hamari ...

rahi baat self-satisfation ki .. tu uskey leye sirf ye zaroori ki jo bhi baat karey uska koee logical reason zaroor dekh ley banda pehlay ... khud ko her tarah sey mutmaeen ker ley pehlay tab hi doosroon ko ker paey ga .. bina sochey .. bina sar paer k ki jaani wali baat jis ka khud banda hi sahi satisfactory reason na dey sakey .. won't live long and won't be accepted by others

+2 EXP

[AQN]

Well app nay bilkul sahi kaha.... and i really agree with ur point "I wud not like to get married to someone whose family won't like me much even if I like/love that person"

jaisay app yeh samjh rahi hain, is tarah har koi mature nahi hota, balkay main nay tau ab tak koi case mature nahi dekha, sab bus paglon ki tarah mukalifat kar rahay hotay hain k parents ghalat hain, .....

jahan parents ghalat hn i have been through such situation.... per wahan bhi jeet baharhaal parents ki hi hoi.....

well i guess it truely and completly depnds on one's fate....some times i think k shayed yeh sach hay k "joray asman pr bantay hain"

"Zameen Pay Zaichay Kehtay Rahay Kuch Aur Mujhay
Wo Asman Pay Sitaray Mere Badalta Raha"....

hmmm ... yea sahi ki bohat zeyada log itna her cheez ko ley k nahi sochtey ... wo samjhtey shaadi sirf 2 bandon k beech ka relation .. so wo agar perfect lag raha at the moment tu poori married life bhi perfect rahey gee ... nah! ... there are lots of things to consider and analyze ... ki aap kitna compromise ker saktey ... kiya kiya wo cheezein jis pey compromise ker saktey ... aap bandey ki family ko ley k kiya feel kerti (since girls has to adjust in this regard) .. uski family aap ko ley k kiya feel kerti n so on ...

agar her cheez k baarey mey thoda pehlay soch lein gey tu expectation bhi usi hisaab sey hogee ... idealistic sey zeyda realistic ho key aik new life mey enter hoga banda ... tu it will bring better result.

aur wahan bhi parents ki jeet sey u meant to say ki jahan hamey parents ghalat lag rahey hotey hein wahan bhi wo sahi hotey ... ya ye matlab ki wo ghalat bhi hon tab bhi unki jeet aur unhi ka faisla mana jaata? ... am not sure which one u meant ...

agar second case hey tu wohi na ... idhar wo apney Parent honey ka advantage ley jaatey hein : ) ... wo tu aulaad ko order ker saktey hein per aulaad nahi ... aur sahi ya ghalat per unki baat na maan k aulaad hi na fermaan kehlaati hey dunya ki nazar mey ... tu mostly log is waja sey bhi parents ki sun letey ki unka farz

baqi true ... fate does play an important role ... agar kisi ki qismat mey hi pursakoon married life nahi tu laakh jaan maar k bhi usey wo sakoon aur khushi nahi mil paati .. so ye tu hamarey ikhteyaar sey bahar ki baat ... hum sirf behtari ki umeed aur dua ... aur behtar bananey k leye cheezon ko apni her mumkin koshish hi ker saktey hein : )

+3 EXP

[Alina]

Here I have a disagreement .... aap ki khud ki hi baat aik doosrey k contradictory hey ...

agar her koee apney mauqqaf ko 100% durust samajh k beyaan karey ga tu who on earth will listen to others ... there never be any afterward Agreement b/w people .... only clashes

jo shakhs khud ko 100% dursut samajh k baat kerta hey wo kabhi bhi doosron k nazaryey ko samajhney k leye flexible nahi hota ... open nahi hota ki is baat ka koee aur pehlo bhi hosakta hey .. aur log bhi Durust hosaktey hein

apney opion n doosrey k opinion ko compare kernay k leye zaroori hey ki jab bhi aap koee baat karein tu ye soch k karein ki shayed log agree na karein meri baat sey ... shayed koee aur isey kisi aur tareeqay sey dekhey ga ... this is something which helps us to understand people

werna jo log khud ko hamesha Mr./Ms. Right samajh k baat kertey hein tu phir logon ki unkey baarey mey kiya raaey hoti hey shayed uska ilm nahi aap ko : ) ... so mera tu mukhlisaana mashwara yehi hey ki jab bhi koee baat karein tu flexible ho key karein ki agley bandey ki bhi aik Soch hey bilkul usi tarah jis tarah hamari ...

rahi baat self-satisfation ki .. tu uskey leye sirf ye zaroori ki jo bhi baat karey uska koee logical reason zaroor dekh ley banda pehlay ... khud ko her tarah sey mutmaeen ker ley pehlay tab hi doosroon ko ker paey ga .. bina sochey .. bina sar paer k ki jaani wali baat jis ka khud banda hi sahi satisfactory reason na dey sakey .. won't live long and won't be accepted by others

per aap ki nazar mey tu wo baat (quotation) kehnay waley ki apni koee opinion hi nahi (as u said earlier) : ) ... n thts amusing in a way k jis bandey ko dunya maan chuki ho .. jis ki wo baat logon ki nazar mey Golden Words hon uskey leye aap aisi baat kahein ... disagreement kerna aur cheez hey aur judgmental hona aur cheez : )

aur jahan tak meri na cheez aqal hey us qoute ka main pehloo yehi hey ki Disagreement opens new doors to explore the other aspects of that thing ... to see it from other angles ...

anyway ... main phir kahoon gee k main ney Next bandey k hawaley sey sabar ki baat nahi kee thi ... 'Sabar Aazma' aik term hoti hey jo insan apney kisi mushkil kaam k leye bhi use ker sakta ... jaisey agar main ney yahan itni saari itni long discussion kee huee hoti tu I say ki itni himmat aur sabar sey itna reply kiya main ney ... tu usi sense mey aap ko kaha ..

per chalein aap ki nazar mey sirf khuch haar jaaney pey sabar hi hey tu main apney alfaaz wapas leti hoon ...

aur na hi main ney ye kaha ki aap mujhey convince karein ... I know u agreed with me so there's left nothing to convince ... isi leye tu wo quote yaad aaee thi ... baat pata nahi kahan ki kahan chali gaee : )

haa'n agar u mean to say ki main ney Bila Waja itni lambi post kee jab ki aap wo saari baatein keh chukein thein shuru sey ley ker aakhir tak ki posts mey ... tu yea that's my lacking cz mujh mey nahi tha itna sabar : ) ki her aik ka detailed reply padhon ...

thoda bohat her aik ki baat padhi taakey uska scool of thought jaan sakoo'n ... Heer ki baat mey kuch aisa tha jis sey disagree kerti thi tu unki baat k response mey yahan reply ker diya ... aur bas : )

@ Aqn...Kisi bhi discussion K haq main aur mukhalif...Dono tarah k points hotay hain....Ham apni roz marrah ki zindagi main wohi kaam apnatay hain jin ko ham right samajhtay hain....Jab aap apnay aap se satisfy hi nahi hon gi....tu ap iss Qabil nahi samjhay gi k aap apna opinion pesh karain....Kiun k opinion pesh karnay k liye zaroori hota hai...K aap ussay apnay liye atleast 100% sach samjhay....Lekin main ne iss k saath yeh add kia...K jab koi aap se disagree karay tu uss ka point bhi samajhnay ki koshish karain..Takay apni islah kar sakay...Because...Ik musalmaan honay k naatay hamain apni islah kartay rehni chahiye....Ab mujh se disagree hain...so main aap k opinion ki qadar karti hon....Lekin aap jiss baat se disagree hain....Woh baat aap ne jannay ki koshish nahi ki...!!
Yahan koi FAisla nahi ho raha k main uss k liye apnay aap ko 100% right samajh k faisla suna don....Ik discussion hain...Aur aap ne yeh jo abhi apna point of view pesh kia....Ager aap ne yeh sooch k diya hai k yeh Ghalat hai ya aap ne jo kaha wo sach nahi...tu i think aap itni lambi post karti bhi nahi...!!
Zaroor aap apnay aap se 100 Nahi tu 99% hi satisfy hon gi...!!

"rahi baat self-satisfation ki .. tu uskey leye sirf ye zaroori ki jo bhi baat karey uska koee logical reason zaroor dekh ley banda pehlay ... khud ko her tarah sey mutmaeen ker ley pehlay tab hi doosroon ko ker paey ga .. bina sochey .. bina sar paer k ki jaani wali baat jis ka khud banda hi sahi satisfactory reason na dey sakey .. won't live long and won't be accepted by others"

Iss Paragraph main...Main sirf "Agreed" likhnay wali thi...Lekin phir aap ko wo Quotation yaad aa jaye ga:P
soo ik baat add karti jaon gi....Jiss se i think aap agree bhi karain gi....Wo yeh k School life main teachers Parhatay parhatay buhat si batain aisi keh jatay hain...K wo bol rahay hotay hain...Aur Ham un ki baaton main khoo jatay hain....phir un k janay k baad soochtay hain k inho ne jo baat bataee wo harf ba harf sach thi....Kabhi aisa Parents k saath ho jata hai...Ham un ki baato ko suntay rehtay hain...Even kabhi hamaray frndz itni achi baatain kar jaatay hain...K ham un ki baatain khamoshi se suntay hain aur akhir main un ko appreciate kartay hain k bilkul sach kaha...!!
tu buhat si baatain aisi hoti hain....Jahan zaroori nahi hota k ham apni baatain add karain...!!
Jahan tak uss Quotation ki Baat hai tu i dont know k kiss philosopher ne kahi...Lekin mujhay yaad hai yeh quotation main ne bhi parhi thi...Aur tab mujhay apni class ki wo larki yaad i thi...k jab main uss k samnay koi baat kehti thi....Aur phir uss se poochti thi k tumhara kia khayal hai...uss ka jawab hamesha yehi hota tha k tum sahi keh rahi ho....Main ne uss k mu se iss baat k alawa kuch nahi suna...:P....Even jab meri ik aur larki se baat ho rahi thi aur wo mere against bol rahi thi...tu meri class fellow uss ki baaton se bhi agree ho rahi thi aur meri baaton se bhi...!!
tu yeh quotation mujhay uss per suit karti dikhi....!!
Aur Jesay aap ne iss quote ko explain kia hai...tu thanks aap ka k aap ne mujhay tasveer ka dosra rukh rooshnaas karwaya....lekin main uss quotation Walay uncle se bilkul agree nahi karti..Seriously....Kiun k Agree karnay wala shakhs ager roshan khayal hai...tu uss se zaroor seekhnay ko kuch millay ga...Aur ager wo meri class fellow ki tarah hai tu phir uss ka Quotation durust hua...!!
Iss topic main actually main ne hi sab k opinion maangay thay....tu mujhay buhat acha laga k iss main itnay logon ne participate kia...Aur main ne sab ki posts parhi...Aur koshish ki k sab ka reply karo....Aur ab bhi koi post karay iss topic main tu main koshish yehi karon gi k Apnay opinion se ussay satisfy karon....Aap issay Sabar Aazma keh lain...Lekin mujhay buhat acha lagta hai jab koi mujh se Muttafiq ho...!!

+5 EXP

[AQN]

@ Aqn...Kisi bhi discussion K haq main aur mukhalif...Dono tarah k points hotay hain....Ham apni roz marrah ki zindagi main wohi kaam apnatay hain jin ko ham right samajhtay hain....Jab aap apnay aap se satisfy hi nahi hon gi....tu ap iss Qabil nahi samjhay gi k aap apna opinion pesh karain....Kiun k opinion pesh karnay k liye zaroori hota hai...K aap ussay apnay liye atleast 100% sach samjhay....Lekin main ne iss k saath yeh add kia...K jab koi aap se disagree karay tu uss ka point bhi samajhnay ki koshish karain..Takay apni islah kar sakay...Because...Ik musalmaan honay k naatay hamain apni islah kartay rehni chahiye....Ab mujh se disagree hain...so main aap k opinion ki qadar karti hon....Lekin aap jiss baat se disagree hain....Woh baat aap ne jannay ki koshish nahi ki...!!
Yahan koi FAisla nahi ho raha k main uss k liye apnay aap ko 100% right samajh k faisla suna don....Ik discussion hain...Aur aap ne yeh jo abhi apna point of view pesh kia....Ager aap ne yeh sooch k diya hai k yeh Ghalat hai ya aap ne jo kaha wo sach nahi...tu i think aap itni lambi post karti bhi nahi...!!
Zaroor aap apnay aap se 100 Nahi tu 99% hi satisfy hon gi...!!

satisfy hona aur khud ko 100% durust samajhna 2 mukhtalif baatein hein .... I would like anyone else here who could tell it in other way too so that u can get what I mean to say ...

main ney kaha ki koee bhi baat hum kehnay lagey tu hamarey paas uskey solid reasons honey chahiyey ... thts what we call satisfaction ... aur 100 % durust samajhna khud ko is More than satisfaction ... aap bataein aik shakahs agar khud ko 100% durust samajh k baat karey ga tu wo kyunker Islah k baarey mey sochey ga jab ki uski nazar mey tu wo 100% durust hey ... islah ki gunjaish tu waheen na jahan kisi kami k honey ki soch rakhi jaaey ... isi leye main ney ye bhi kaha ki aap ki khud ki baatein hi aik doosrey k khilaaf hein .. agar 100% durust samjhey banda tu wo doosrey ki baat sunney ki bhi zehmat nahi karey ga .. islah tu dur ki baat

tu I guess aap sey yahan baat kehnay mey thodi gar bar hogaee .. per matlab aap ka exactly ye nahi tha ...

aur konsi baat janney ki koshish nahi ki me ney? .... u mean mujhey aap sey dobara confirm kerna chahiyey tha ki 100% durust honey sey aap ki kiya muraad? ya kia!!

aap ney pehlay bhi badey wasooq sey kaha ki main ney quote ko samjha hi nahi ... ab phir wasooq sey keh rahi hein ki main ney janney ki koshish nahi kee! : )
doosroon k baarey mey itni hatmi raaey na diya karein ... thoda benefit of doubt apney paas rakha karein ... logon sey interaction mey aur unhey samajhney mey aasaani hogee I guess aap ko

+2 EXP

[AQN]

Iss Paragraph main...Main sirf "Agreed" likhnay wali thi...Lekin phir aap ko wo Quotation yaad aa jaye ga:P
soo ik baat add karti jaon gi....Jiss se i think aap agree bhi karain gi....Wo yeh k School life main teachers Parhatay parhatay buhat si batain aisi keh jatay hain...K wo bol rahay hotay hain...Aur Ham un ki baaton main khoo jatay hain....phir un k janay k baad soochtay hain k inho ne jo baat bataee wo harf ba harf sach thi....Kabhi aisa Parents k saath ho jata hai...Ham un ki baato ko suntay rehtay hain...Even kabhi hamaray frndz itni achi baatain kar jaatay hain...K ham un ki baatain khamoshi se suntay hain aur akhir main un ko appreciate kartay hain k bilkul sach kaha...!!
tu buhat si baatain aisi hoti hain....Jahan zaroori nahi hota k ham apni baatain add karain...!!
Jahan tak uss Quotation ki Baat hai tu i dont know k kiss philosopher ne kahi...Lekin mujhay yaad hai yeh quotation main ne bhi parhi thi...Aur tab mujhay apni class ki wo larki yaad i thi...k jab main uss k samnay koi baat kehti thi....Aur phir uss se poochti thi k tumhara kia khayal hai...uss ka jawab hamesha yehi hota tha k tum sahi keh rahi ho....Main ne uss k mu se iss baat k alawa kuch nahi suna...:P....Even jab meri ik aur larki se baat ho rahi thi aur wo mere against bol rahi thi...tu meri class fellow uss ki baaton se bhi agree ho rahi thi aur meri baaton se bhi...!!
tu yeh quotation mujhay uss per suit karti dikhi....!!
Aur Jesay aap ne iss quote ko explain kia hai...tu thanks aap ka k aap ne mujhay tasveer ka dosra rukh rooshnaas karwaya....lekin main uss quotation Walay uncle se bilkul agree nahi karti..Seriously....Kiun k Agree karnay wala shakhs ager roshan khayal hai...tu uss se zaroor seekhnay ko kuch millay ga...Aur ager wo meri class fellow ki tarah hai tu phir uss ka Quotation durust hua...!!
Iss topic main actually main ne hi sab k opinion maangay thay....tu mujhay buhat acha laga k iss main itnay logon ne participate kia...Aur main ne sab ki posts parhi...Aur koshish ki k sab ka reply karo....Aur ab bhi koi post karay iss topic main tu main koshish yehi karon gi k Apnay opinion se ussay satisfy karon....Aap issay Sabar Aazma keh lain...Lekin mujhay buhat acha lagta hai jab koi mujh se Muttafiq ho...!!

nahi aap sirf agreed bhi likh deti tu bhi kuch nahi hota : ) cz 'once bitten ... twice shy' .... doodh ka jala chhaach bhi phoonk phoonk k peeta hey : )

jee bilkul agree kerti hoon ki bohat dafa bohat sey log kuch kehtey hein n we end up saying 'agreed' ............... aap mera wo msg samjh nahi paaein ya main samjha nahi paee : ) ... so let's forget it

rahi baat aap ki us classfellow ki jo her aik ko yehi answer deti thi ki I agree ... well us tarah k bhi log hotey hein ... kuch log waqee khud sey cheezon ko sahi ya ghalat k tarazoo mey toleny k qabil nahi hotey ... reasons nahi dhoond saktey baatoon mey .. aur kuch log bas lambi baatoon sey bachney k leye gol mol sa jawab dena chahtey hein ...

aur phir aap ney dheyan nahi diya ..quote was I CAN'T learn with the person who agrees with me ... just like did u learn anything from that class fellow ever??

Have u ever experienced someone had disagreement with u .. u 2 had discussion .. n at the end u agree with what tht other person was saying?? agar aisa experince pehlay nahi huwa tu chalein abhi ki hi misaal dey deti hoon jaisey aap ney kaha ki me ney us quote ka doosra pehloo dikhaya ... so matlab kiya huwa ki u learned something from me ... huwa na? ......

so agar is maamley mey main aap sey aur aap mujh sey agree kertein tu wud have u learned this? ... nahi na! tu ye baat kehnay wala phir bhi ghalat lagta hey tu sure .. her aik ko poora haq hey kisi ki bhi baat sey agree ya disagree kerna ka

+2 EXP

[Alina]

satisfy hona aur khud ko 100% durust samajhna 2 mukhtalif baatein hein .... I would like anyone else here who could tell it in other way too so that u can get what I mean to say ...

main ney kaha ki koee bhi baat hum kehnay lagey tu hamarey paas uskey solid reasons honey chahiyey ... thts what we call satisfaction ... aur 100 % durust samajhna khud ko is More than satisfaction ... aap bataein aik shakahs agar khud ko 100% durust samajh k baat karey ga tu wo kyunker Islah k baarey mey sochey ga jab ki uski nazar mey tu wo 100% durust hey ... islah ki gunjaish tu waheen na jahan kisi kami k honey ki soch rakhi jaaey ... isi leye main ney ye bhi kaha ki aap ki khud ki baatein hi aik doosrey k khilaaf hein .. agar 100% durust samjhey banda tu wo doosrey ki baat sunney ki bhi zehmat nahi karey ga .. islah tu dur ki baat

tu I guess aap sey yahan baat kehnay mey thodi gar bar hogaee .. per matlab aap ka exactly ye nahi tha ...

aur konsi baat janney ki koshish nahi ki me ney? .... u mean mujhey aap sey dobara confirm kerna chahiyey tha ki 100% durust honey sey aap ki kiya muraad? ya kia!!

aap ney pehlay bhi badey wasooq sey kaha ki main ney quote ko samjha hi nahi ... ab phir wasooq sey keh rahi hein ki main ney janney ki koshish nahi kee! : )
doosroon k baarey mey itni hatmi raaey na diya karein ... thoda benefit of doubt apney paas rakha karein ... logon sey interaction mey aur unhey samajhney mey aasaani hogee I guess aap ko

Main phir yehi kahon g k koi apnay opinion ko jab tak durust nahi samjhay ga....Ap iss qabil nahi ho paaye ga k kesay apna muaqaff pesh karain....Aur 100% se muraad....ik example deti hon aap ko....k ager aap samajhti hai k Jhoot bolna buri baat hai tu aap apnay aap ko 100% sahi samjhay gi...Aur ussay apnayein gi...Lekin Ik musalman honay k naatay ham itnay open minded hain k ager koi mulana sahab yeh keh dein k MAslehat main bhi jhoot na bolo...tu aap phir apni raaye uss per dain g k kiya karna chahiye...Agree or disagree..!!
Ager aap khud se 100% satisfy nahi hon gi...tu phir aap roz marrah ki zindagi main jhoot ko apnati hon g,...Aur phir jab koi discussion ho ga iss mamlay main....tu uss time aap yehi soochain g k jhoot ka saath diya jaaye....ya phir apnay aap ko iss qabil nahi samjhay g k uss discussion main participate karain....!!

Ab main ager phir yehi kahon k aap ne meri baat nahi samjhi tu aap shayed mind kar jaayein...MAin ne aap k baaray main filhaal koi raaye nahi di...Infact aap ne Zaroor Raaye di thi apni Quotation wali post main=)....Main yahan copy/paste kar rahi hon...!!

"u know wo hota hey na insan k ander aik urge hoti hey apni raey denay ki even agar wo kisi sey agree bhi kerta ho (jaisey me myself) ... tu bohat kam log hotey jo shayed itney sabar waley hotey hein : ) ... I mean meri nazar mey ye sabar hi hey ... jaisey aap khamosh rahein
waisey am learning to be this way at times "
Ab aap apni post per nazar-e-Sani kar lain kiun k aap ki apni baaton main ikhtilaaf hai...!!

+2 EXP

[Alina]

nahi aap sirf agreed bhi likh deti tu bhi kuch nahi hota : ) cz 'once bitten ... twice shy' .... doodh ka jala chhaach bhi phoonk phoonk k peeta hey : )

jee bilkul agree kerti hoon ki bohat dafa bohat sey log kuch kehtey hein n we end up saying 'agreed' ............... aap mera wo msg samjh nahi paaein ya main samjha nahi paee : ) ... so let's forget it

rahi baat aap ki us classfellow ki jo her aik ko yehi answer deti thi ki I agree ... well us tarah k bhi log hotey hein ... kuch log waqee khud sey cheezon ko sahi ya ghalat k tarazoo mey toleny k qabil nahi hotey ... reasons nahi dhoond saktey baatoon mey .. aur kuch log bas lambi baatoon sey bachney k leye gol mol sa jawab dena chahtey hein ...

aur phir aap ney dheyan nahi diya ..quote was I CAN'T learn with the person who agrees with me ... just like did u learn anything from that class fellow ever??

Have u ever experienced someone had disagreement with u .. u 2 had discussion .. n at the end u agree with what tht other person was saying?? agar aisa experince pehlay nahi huwa tu chalein abhi ki hi misaal dey deti hoon jaisey aap ney kaha ki me ney us quote ka doosra pehloo dikhaya ... so matlab kiya huwa ki u learned something from me ... huwa na? ......

so agar is maamley mey main aap sey aur aap mujh sey agree kertein tu wud have u learned this? ... nahi na! tu ye baat kehnay wala phir bhi ghalat lagta hey tu sure .. her aik ko poora haq hey kisi ki bhi baat sey agree ya disagree kerna ka

[B]"nahi aap sirf agreed bhi likh deti tu bhi kuch nahi hota : ) cz 'once bitten ... twice shy' .... doodh ka jala chhaach bhi phoonk phoonk k peeta hey : )"
=)....Iss post ko dekh kar mujhay ik buhat hi common si kahawat yad aa gaee..."Insan kisi haal main bhi khush nahi hai"
kher...Discussion tab hota hai jab aap k muaqaff main hamain kuch garbar lagi ho...chahay agree bhi ho....uss time mujhay nahi lagi thi...Lekin uss agree ki baat per jo aap nay apni raaye di uss main mujhay garbar lagi...!!
jee janab....Class fellow k baaray main jo main ne soocha tha wo byan kar chuki...Tabhi i said, that quoation suits to her!!
yes...I have alot of discussion...Main in discussions main buhat intrest leti hon...Meri sis jo K.University main lecturer hai...MAin uss se buhat discuss karti hon...Aur main apni islah kar leti hon kaafi mamlat main...Aur yeh baat har insan janta hai k disagreement se hamain buhat si baatain pata chalta hai...Even ham uss se agree karain ya nahi...!!
Aur jahan tak aap k last para ki baat hai...!!

"so agar is maamley mey main aap sey aur aap mujh sey agree kertein tu wud have u learned this? ... nahi na! tu ye baat kehnay wala phir bhi ghalat lagta hey tu sure .. her aik ko poora haq hey kisi ki bhi baat sey agree ya disagree kerna ka "
tu janab Ager Agree karnay wala insan buhat achi raaye deta ho...Aur wo aap se agree kar lay...tu aap yeh soocho gay k Main ne Sahi baat hi ki ho gi k uss ne mujh se agree kia...Aur zaroori nahi hai k koi itna Be-Sabra ho k uss ki raaye na sunay...!![/B]

+2 EXP

[Alina]

@AQN....Har insan do tarah ki baatain karta hai....Ya tu bilawaja koi baat kehna....Ya Ziyadatar log aisay hotay hain jin ki baat k peechay koi maqsad hota hai...!!
Aap ne wo quotation ager bilawaja kahi thi tu Samjhana mera maqsad tha...Main ne aap ko uss ka dosra pehlo bhi bata diya....!!
Aur ager uss post ka koi maqsad tha tu ab mera maqsad aap ko samjhana hai k aap ne Actually kaha kia tha...!!
JAb ham koi bhi Quotation Likhtay hain...tu uss k kuch rules hotay hain...For e.g;...Hamain pata hona chahiye...K iss quotations k Kia kia Meanings ho saktay hain...uss quotation ki Bareekiyaan pata honi chahiye....Takay wo quote kehnay walay per bhi suit karay...Aur jiss k liye keh rahay hain uss per bhi...!!
Aap ne jab yeh quotation quote ki...Tab aap ko iss ki dosri meanings pata nahi thi...Aur na hi bareekiyaan.....Jesay baad main aap ne khud meri class fellow wali baat samajh li....tu iss tarah aap ne iss quote ki dosri meaning bhi samajh li...!!
Aur bareekiyaan aap Ab samajh lain....Jab koi Quotation ya Wisdom of expression ham keh rahay hotay hain tu Wordings kisi aur ki hoti hain...Lekin Andaz hamara wesa hi hota hai...Jesa kehnay walay ka....jis philosopher ne yeh quotation likhi hai...Wo koi buhat bara Ilm ka Talib tha...Jissay urtay huye piranday k parr ginnay se bhi shaghaf ho ga...!!
Lekin aap k Baqool aap Itni sabar wali nahi k aap sab ki posts parhay....MEans aap uss philosopher ki tarah ilm ki talib nahi....!!
tu yeh quotation quote karna aap per suit nahi kia....!!

+2 EXP

[Heer_Malik]

hmmm ... yea sahi ki bohat zeyada log itna her cheez ko ley k nahi sochtey ... wo samjhtey shaadi sirf 2 bandon k beech ka relation .. so wo agar perfect lag raha at the moment tu poori married life bhi perfect rahey gee ... nah! ... there are lots of things to consider and analyze ... ki aap kitna compromise ker saktey ... kiya kiya wo cheezein jis pey compromise ker saktey ... aap bandey ki family ko ley k kiya feel kerti (since girls has to adjust in this regard) .. uski family aap ko ley k kiya feel kerti n so on ...

agar her cheez k baarey mey thoda pehlay soch lein gey tu expectation bhi usi hisaab sey hogee ... idealistic sey zeyda realistic ho key aik new life mey enter hoga banda ... tu it will bring better result.

aur wahan bhi parents ki jeet sey u meant to say ki jahan hamey parents ghalat lag rahey hotey hein wahan bhi wo sahi hotey ... ya ye matlab ki wo ghalat bhi hon tab bhi unki jeet aur unhi ka faisla mana jaata? ... am not sure which one u meant ...

agar second case hey tu wohi na ... idhar wo apney Parent honey ka advantage ley jaatey hein : ) ... wo tu aulaad ko order ker saktey hein per aulaad nahi ... aur sahi ya ghalat per unki baat na maan k aulaad hi na fermaan kehlaati hey dunya ki nazar mey ... tu mostly log is waja sey bhi parents ki sun letey ki unka farz

baqi true ... fate does play an important role ... agar kisi ki qismat mey hi pursakoon married life nahi tu laakh jaan maar k bhi usey wo sakoon aur khushi nahi mil paati .. so ye tu hamarey ikhteyaar sey bahar ki baat ... hum sirf behtari ki umeed aur dua ... aur behtar bananey k leye cheezon ko apni her mumkin koshish hi ker saktey hein : )

woooooooooooohhhhhhh mahool kafi garma garam hay.... khairrrr

Ji AQN i mean the 2nd meaning k parents ghalat ho kar bhi jeet jatay hain, apnay parents honay ka faida uthatay hain......

aur us per sitam yeh kay un ki sab batain maan kar, apny pyar ki qurbani day kar bhi aulad nafarman kehlati hay....

hay na sad baat.......................

The rest i agree ....

+1 EXP

[AQN]

=)....Iss post ko dekh kar mujhay ik buhat hi common si kahawat yad aa gaee..."Insan kisi haal main bhi khush nahi hai"
kher...Discussion tab hota hai jab aap k muaqaff main hamain kuch garbar lagi ho...chahay agree bhi ho....uss time mujhay nahi lagi thi...Lekin uss agree ki baat per jo aap nay apni raaye di uss main mujhay garbar lagi...!!
jee janab....Class fellow k baaray main jo main ne soocha tha wo byan kar chuki...Tabhi i said, that quoation suits to her!!
yes...I have alot of discussion...Main in discussions main buhat intrest leti hon...Meri sis jo K.University main lecturer hai...MAin uss se buhat discuss karti hon...Aur main apni islah kar leti hon kaafi mamlat main...Aur yeh baat har insan janta hai k disagreement se hamain buhat si baatain pata chalta hai...Even ham uss se agree karain ya nahi...!!
[/B]

aur ab shayed aap ney meri her baat ko Doosra rang denay ka hi soch liya hey : ) .......... ye kahawat tab yahan saadiq aati agar tu main ney kaha hota pehlay ki 'aap ney sirf Agreed KYUN likha?' ... aur ab kaha hota "aap ney itni baat KYUN kee?' ............... : ) per chalein shayed aap isi sense mey use kerti hon wo kahawat jaisey yahan ki use.

wo Quotation quote kerna waisey tu bohat hi ghalat hogeya per chalein isi bahaney kaafi soch aap ki pata chal gaee

and for the record, that quotation doesn't suit ur that class fellow ... she sounds like someone who don't wanna Think .. don't wanna ponder about things .. n quotation reflects how much the person (who said this) love exploring and learning things from others

aur aap jo red mey mark ki aap ki baat main ney wo padhein aur meri baat jo main pehlay keh chuki zara usey yaad karein tu bataein main itni daer sey aur kiya keh rahi hoon?? ........... aap aik baat kehti hein ..phir aagey khud hi ki baat ki terdeed ya mukhalifat mey koee doosri baat keh deti hein ... aur ye bhi andaza nahi ki main exactly keh kiya rahi : ) ... shayed thoda mind clear ker k padhein meri baatein tu may be it will be helpful.

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[AQN]

Aur jahan tak aap k last para ki baat hai...!!

"so agar is maamley mey main aap sey aur aap mujh sey agree kertein tu wud have u learned this? ... nahi na! tu ye baat kehnay wala phir bhi ghalat lagta hey tu sure .. her aik ko poora haq hey kisi ki bhi baat sey agree ya disagree kerna ka "
tu janab Ager Agree karnay wala insan buhat achi raaye deta ho...Aur wo aap se agree kar lay...tu aap yeh soocho gay k Main ne Sahi baat hi ki ho gi k uss ne mujh se agree kia...Aur zaroori nahi hai k koi itna Be-Sabra ho k uss ki raaye na sunay...!![/B][/COLOR]

heinnnn!!!!!!! ....... ye baat tu poori meray sar sey k oper sey guzar gaee : )

bad of me!!

[AQN]

@AQN....Har insan do tarah ki baatain karta hai....Ya tu bilawaja koi baat kehna....Ya Ziyadatar log aisay hotay hain jin ki baat k peechay koi maqsad hota hai...!!
Aap ne wo quotation ager bilawaja kahi thi tu Samjhana mera maqsad tha...Main ne aap ko uss ka dosra pehlo bhi bata diya....!!
Aur ager uss post ka koi maqsad tha tu ab mera maqsad aap ko samjhana hai k aap ne Actually kaha kia tha...!!
JAb ham koi bhi Quotation Likhtay hain...tu uss k kuch rules hotay hain...For e.g;...Hamain pata hona chahiye...K iss quotations k Kia kia Meanings ho saktay hain...uss quotation ki Bareekiyaan pata honi chahiye....Takay wo quote kehnay walay per bhi suit karay...Aur jiss k liye keh rahay hain uss per bhi...!!
Aap ne jab yeh quotation quote ki...Tab aap ko iss ki dosri meanings pata nahi thi...Aur na hi bareekiyaan.....Jesay baad main aap ne khud meri class fellow wali baat samajh li....tu iss tarah aap ne iss quote ki dosri meaning bhi samajh li...!!
Aur bareekiyaan aap Ab samajh lain....Jab koi Quotation ya Wisdom of expression ham keh rahay hotay hain tu Wordings kisi aur ki hoti hain...Lekin Andaz hamara wesa hi hota hai...Jesa kehnay walay ka....jis philosopher ne yeh quotation likhi hai...Wo koi buhat bara Ilm ka Talib tha...Jissay urtay huye piranday k parr ginnay se bhi shaghaf ho ga...!!
Lekin aap k Baqool aap Itni sabar wali nahi k aap sab ki posts parhay....MEans aap uss philosopher ki tarah ilm ki talib nahi....!!
tu yeh quotation quote karna aap per suit nahi kia....!!

dono baari mey samjhaana aap ka maqsad tha : ) ......... yea sahi jab 100 % dursut samajh k khud ko aap baat karein gee tu Samanjhna tu bas hamarey leye hi reh jaata hey ... Islah ki zaroorat sirf hamey : )

waisey aik aur baat Her baat k Mukhtalif ya aik sey zeyada pehloo nahi hotey ... so is baat ko aap her jagah implement nahi ker saktein ... nazaryey ... soch .. dekhnay ka andaaz .. ye sab k aik doosrey sey mukhtalif ... per Sentence jo clear hon un mey ye nahi ki her koee usey apni nazar sey dekhay aur apni meaning akhaz karey ... jis tarah 'insan kisi haal mey khush nahi hota' ka kiya matlab ye sab ko pata aur is mey kiya baat ki gaee wo sab k leye same hey .. sirf logon k kehnay ka andaaz aur alfaaz aagey peechay hosaktey hein ... usi tarah us quote ka bhi bohat hi wazeh matlab hey .. aur maqsad wise aik hi ...

so mujhey tu wo quotation quote kernay sey pehlay bhi ... us waqt bhi .. aur ab bhi bohat wazeh taur pey pata hey ki uska kiya matlab tha/hey ... kiya baareekiyaan hein us mey : ) ....... ab aap ki nazar mey main itni kam aqal tu chalein iska tu main kuch nahi ker sakti : ) ......

per aik aur ghalati aap ki durr kernay ki ghustaakhi ki mujhey ab bhi us quote ki sirf wohi meaning pata hein jo pehlay pata thein ...

n wow! very Nice comprehension and comparison of my words k 'itna sabar nahi k her aik ki poori post padh sakoon' ... : ) chalein yunhi samajh lein aap ki nahi hoon main talib ilm ki ....

wo pehlay ye post padhi nahi thi aur isi sey related aik baat oper waley msg mey keh chuki waisey

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[AQN]

woooooooooooohhhhhhh mahool kafi garma garam hay.... khairrrr

Ji AQN i mean the 2nd meaning k parents ghalat ho kar bhi jeet jatay hain, apnay parents honay ka faida uthatay hain......

aur us per sitam yeh kay un ki sab batain maan kar, apny pyar ki qurbani day kar bhi aulad nafarman kehlati hay....

hay na sad baat.......................

The rest i agree ....

yea : ) wo asal topic ki aaj thodi thandi pad gaee thi na is leye : ) @ mahool garam

hmmm sahi .. ye advantage tu zaroor milta hey parents ko ... bilkul usi tarah jis tarah aulaad jab chhoti hoti tu kaafi kuch na chahtey huey bhi parents ko maanna padta ... : ) u knw bachchon ki zid k aagey ... shayed ye phir usi ka badal hota hey .. ya phir aur baqi jo wo hamarey leye ker chukey hotey hein uska thoda re-pay

n yea kuch parents aisey bhi hotey ki unki baat maan bhi lee jaati tab bhi unkey dil mey ye baat baeth jaati ki usney hamarey khilaaf (soch k khilaaf) kuch socha bhi tu kaisey socha! n they show this by their behavior later on. .. so yea jo log face kertey aisa kuch tu ye waqee worse hey

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[AQN]

Main phir yehi kahon g k koi apnay opinion ko jab tak durust nahi samjhay ga....Ap iss qabil nahi ho paaye ga k kesay apna muaqaff pesh karain....Aur 100% se muraad....ik example deti hon aap ko....k ager aap samajhti hai k Jhoot bolna buri baat hai tu aap apnay aap ko 100% sahi samjhay gi...Aur ussay apnayein gi...Lekin Ik musalman honay k naatay ham itnay open minded hain k ager koi mulana sahab yeh keh dein k MAslehat main bhi jhoot na bolo...tu aap phir apni raaye uss per dain g k kiya karna chahiye...Agree or disagree..!!
Ager aap khud se 100% satisfy nahi hon gi...tu phir aap roz marrah ki zindagi main jhoot ko apnati hon g,...Aur phir jab koi discussion ho ga iss mamlay main....tu uss time aap yehi soochain g k jhoot ka saath diya jaaye....ya phir apnay aap ko iss qabil nahi samjhay g k uss discussion main participate karain....!!

\

mujey exactly samajh nahi aaee ki aap actual mey kiya kehna chah rahein .. per isi jhoot ki baat k tanazar mey bata deti hoon .. agar main khud ko 100% sahi samajhti hongee k maslehatan jhoot bolna jaez tu I WON'T listen to anybody. meri nazar mey phir mujhey kisi Islah ki zaroorat nahi cz am right.

agar meray paas kuch solid reason hongey iskey aur aik satisfatory level hoga is baat ka .. per apni is soch ko paththar pey lakeer yani 100 % durust nahi samajhti hongee tu agar koee mujhey ye kahey ga ki nahi Maslehatan bhi bolna jaez nahi ... tu I will listen to that person ... try asking him/her to give me enough reasons and example so that I can be convinced. agar aisey reason bata deya ga banda tu main qaael hojaon gee ki theek maslehatan bhi nahi bolna chahiyey n nahi bolon gee .. agar nahi dey paya tu apni soch pey qaaem rahon gee

jo meri tarah sochta hoga ki haan maslehatan bol saktey hein us sey main kuch neya nahi seekhon gee is baat ko ley k ... jo sochta hooga nahi bol saktey aur jo mujhey qael karey ga us sey main zaroor kuch seekhoon gee

I think us quote ko explain kernay ka is sey wazeh tareeqa aur nahi filhaal .. agar ab bhi meri baat ka koee ghalat maqsad tu am helpless.

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[AQN]

Ab main ager phir yehi kahon k aap ne meri baat nahi samjhi tu aap shayed mind kar jaayein...MAin ne aap k baaray main filhaal koi raaye nahi di...Infact aap ne Zaroor Raaye di thi apni Quotation wali post main=)....Main yahan copy/paste kar rahi hon...!!

"u know wo hota hey na insan k ander aik urge hoti hey apni raey denay ki even agar wo kisi sey agree bhi kerta ho (jaisey me myself) ... tu bohat kam log hotey jo shayed itney sabar waley hotey hein : ) ... I mean meri nazar mey ye sabar hi hey ... jaisey aap khamosh rahein
waisey am learning to be this way at times "
Ab aap apni post per nazar-e-Sani kar lain kiun k aap ki apni baaton main ikhtilaaf hai...!!

aisa tu nahi ki aap ko laga us quote ko padh k ki in other words ur of no use for me?? ya ye ki aap is qabil nahi k main aap sey kuch seekh sakoon!!! .............. aap ko aisa kuch feel huwa tha??? Goshh!!!

meri ye na cheez aqal ab bhi apni is baat mey Wo cheez dekhnay sey qasir hey jo aap dekh rahein hein ... aap ney quote kiya tu ye bhi batana tha na ki kahan hey meri apni baatoon mey ikhtelaaf aur kahan main ney aap k baarey mey raey dee??

meri nazar mey ye aik good quality hey (or at least sometime ppl ask me to be that way) ki her baar hi apni raey dena zaroori nahi hota .. aap agree kertey hein tu kabhi aagey sey khamosh bhi hojaya karo ... ki dono ko pata hey ki baat aisi aisi hey tu phir kehnay ka faeda! ... ye baat kuch baar log mujhey kehtey hein : ) isi leye me ney kaha bhi tha ki am learning to be like this ... ab is mey aisa kiya tha ye aap hi bata dein plz.

aap ney aik baar nahi kaee baar kaafi Hatmi raaey dee hey meray baarey mey idhar : )

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[Heer_Malik]

yea : ) wo asal topic ki aaj thodi thandi pad gaee thi na is leye : ) @ mahool garam

hmmm sahi .. ye advantage tu zaroor milta hey parents ko ... bilkul usi tarah jis tarah aulaad jab chhoti hoti tu kaafi kuch na chahtey huey bhi parents ko maanna padta ... : ) u knw bachchon ki zid k aagey ... shayed ye phir usi ka badal hota hey .. ya phir aur baqi jo wo hamarey leye ker chukey hotey hein uska thoda re-pay

n yea kuch parents aisey bhi hotey ki unki baat maan bhi lee jaati tab bhi unkey dil mey ye baat baeth jaati ki usney hamarey khilaaf (soch k khilaaf) kuch socha bhi tu kaisey socha! n they show this by their behavior later on. .. so yea jo log face kertey aisa kuch tu ye waqee worse hey

haan yaar sahi keh rahi ho app.......... pata nahi parents aesa kyon karte hain.....

agar is aik point per unhay apni hi manwani hoti hay tau bachpan say hi unhay bachon ki zid mannay ki bajaye unhay apni baat manay ki adat dalni chahiye..............hamari upbringing hi ghalat andaz main hoti hay..........har cheez maan laitay hain shuroo main aur is zindagi kay aham tareen point per akar parents aesay ho jatay hain k insaan yeh sochnay per majboor ho jata hay kay kya yeh wohi parents hain...

Mujhay bht afsoos hota hay aisay parents per aur aesay bachon se bht hamdardi....

Bus .... shayed yeh wajah hay kay apni family main is tarah k cases main main nay hamesha vital role play kiya, jahan tak ho saka, apnay cuzns ka saath diya, aur un ky parents ko samjhanay ki koshish ki Aur Alhumdulilah.... Allah nay mujhay kaamyabi di...

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[Alina]

well...Yeh post parh kar mujhay Mujhay itna andaza ho gaya...K koi agree ho na ho...Aap apnay muqaff per qaim rahay gi...Means Islah ki gunjaish aap ne rakhi nahi=)

"wo Quotation quote kerna waisey tu bohat hi ghalat hogeya per chalein isi bahaney kaafi soch aap ki pata chal gaee "

Chalain aap ne yeh tu realize kia k Quotation ap ko Quote nahi karni thi=)...!!

"n wow! very Nice comprehension and comparison of my words k 'itna sabar nahi k her aik ki poori post padh sakoon' ... : ) chalein yunhi samajh lein aap ki nahi hoon main talib ilm ki .... "
Well....jo insan ilm Ka talib hota hai....Wo har cheez se kuch na kuch seekhta hai...Apnay aap ko Right nahi samjhta hai....Jesay k aap shuru se hain=)....Jis tarah aap ne meri agree honay per unsatisfy ho kar Quote sunaya...tu uss quote ka taqaza tha k aap ko sab ki posts bhi parhni thi....Takay aap ziyada ilm Hasil kar sakain=)
Lekin chalain....Aap shayed sirf apnay asaatzaah ki Hadh tak Ilm se Shaghaf rakhti hon gi...aap ki marzi...!!
Aur jis tarah aap ne kaha k "Nice comprehension and comparison of my words"...tu aap itni Dear se khud mere wordings ko Pakar rahi hain....Aur jawaban main ne ap ki wordings pakrii tu aap Bura maan rahi hain=)

"waisey aik aur baat Her baat k Mukhtalif ya aik sey zeyada pehloo nahi hotey "

Waqt/situation per buhat depend karta hai....JAb ham koi baat General way main kahain tu wo alag hoti hai....Aur jab ham ussay kisi k liye kahain...tu alag ho jati hai...Jesay yeh kahawat k insan kisi haal main khush nahi Aik general si kahawat hai...Lekin main ne yeh aap k liye kahi...tu aap ne issay mind kiya...!!

"heinnnn!!!!!!! ....... ye baat tu poori meray sar sey k oper sey guzar gaee : )

bad of me!! "
hmmnn...aap ne jo abhi baat ki hai....Iss ka jawab main kaee tarah se day sakti hon...Mujhay serious discussions main kisi ka mazaq uranay ki adat nahi...Kiun k kisi ko neecha dikha kar main Aala nahi banna chahti...!!=)
May be meri mistake ho samjhanay ki=)...tu janab aap ne kaha k aap itni Sabar wali nahi...K aap sab ki posts parhay...Acha hota jo aap main thora sabar hota...Takay apni islah kar sakti...!!=)

I know ab aap ki Agli post main aap ne mera ISLAH ka word pakra hoa hoga..bcoz its ur habit K "koi tu machli haath aaye"=)

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[Alina]

mujey exactly samajh nahi aaee ki aap actual mey kiya kehna chah rahein .. per isi jhoot ki baat k tanazar mey bata deti hoon .. agar main khud ko 100% sahi samajhti hongee k maslehatan jhoot bolna jaez tu I WON'T listen to anybody. meri nazar mey phir mujhey kisi Islah ki zaroorat nahi cz am right.

agar meray paas kuch solid reason hongey iskey aur aik satisfatory level hoga is baat ka .. per apni is soch ko paththar pey lakeer yani 100 % durust nahi samajhti hongee tu agar koee mujhey ye kahey ga ki nahi Maslehatan bhi bolna jaez nahi ... tu I will listen to that person ... try asking him/her to give me enough reasons and example so that I can be convinced. agar aisey reason bata deya ga banda tu main qaael hojaon gee ki theek maslehatan bhi nahi bolna chahiyey n nahi bolon gee .. agar nahi dey paya tu apni soch pey qaaem rahon gee

jo meri tarah sochta hoga ki haan maslehatan bol saktey hein us sey main kuch neya nahi seekhon gee is baat ko ley k ... jo sochta hooga nahi bol saktey aur jo mujhey qael karey ga us sey main zaroor kuch seekhoon gee

I think us quote ko explain kernay ka is sey wazeh tareeqa aur nahi filhaal .. agar ab bhi meri baat ka koee ghalat maqsad tu am helpless.

Main ne apni koshish Tamam kardi...Ager aap ko Samajh nahi aa raha tu I dont want to kill my time in conviencing u....!!

[AQN]

haan yaar sahi keh rahi ho app.......... pata nahi parents aesa kyon karte hain.....

agar is aik point per unhay apni hi manwani hoti hay tau bachpan say hi unhay bachon ki zid mannay ki bajaye unhay apni baat manay ki adat dalni chahiye..............hamari upbringing hi ghalat andaz main hoti hay..........har cheez maan laitay hain shuroo main aur is zindagi kay aham tareen point per akar parents aesay ho jatay hain k insaan yeh sochnay per majboor ho jata hay kay kya yeh wohi parents hain...

Mujhay bht afsoos hota hay aisay parents per aur aesay bachon se bht hamdardi....

Bus .... shayed yeh wajah hay kay apni family main is tarah k cases main main nay hamesha vital role play kiya, jahan tak ho saka, apnay cuzns ka saath diya, aur un ky parents ko samjhanay ki koshish ki Aur Alhumdulilah.... Allah nay mujhay kaamyabi di...

yea mostly tu nahi per sahi kaafi example aisi dekhnay ko milti ki shuru sey her cheez mey bachchey ki pasand .. uski her baat maan lee .. aur aisi ahum baat pey itney rigid hojaatey k pata nahi kiya maaang liya bachchey ney : )

jee sahi kertein hein ... her wo baat jo kaafi had tak sahi aur reasonable ho tu hum sab ko hi koshish kerni chahiyey k koee bilawaja sirf kisi ki zid ki bhaent na chadhey ...

thou hamarey yahan koee is qism ki itni azaadi nahi ..like bohat zeyada real life mey opposite gender sey mix up hona nahi .. both for bros n us (gals) .. neither we do ki koee bhi ghar aasakata ya kisi k saath bhi jaa saktey .. n all tht ... per shaadi k maamley mey my parents are ALHAMDOLILAH quite more felxible ... even jitna hona bhi nahi chahiyey : ) as my father says bas Kalma go ho .. baqi insan aagey peechay change ho hi jaata hey agar muhabbat sey rahey n all that ...

meray bro ki love marriage hey tu jab wo baat huee tu we all were ok ki theek if its like this tu sirf is baat ko issue nahi banana k us ney Khud kaisey pasand ker lee ... even kaafi kuch aisa tha jo hamari family k lehaaz sey sahi nahi tha .. but all done without any fuss ... n ALHAMDOLILAH we lives together ...

I think jab parents compromise ker k khushi khushi aulaad ki pasand apnaatey hein tu uskey back mind mey ye baat aik ehsaan ki tarah yaad rehti hey ... aur phir aaney wali zindagi mey wo uska qarz her mumkin tareeqay sey utaarney ki koshish kerta hey ...
like agar koee baat unch neech ho tu agar arranged marriage hogee tu banda (beta) thoda ignorant hojaata hey .. per in love case wo conscious rehta aisi cheezo ko ley k k kaheen baat ye na aajey ki see tumhaari pasand hey na tu ye kharabhi n all that. at least I feel this way : ) what u say?

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[Alina]

aisa tu nahi ki aap ko laga us quote ko padh k ki in other words ur of no use for me?? ya ye ki aap is qabil nahi k main aap sey kuch seekh sakoon!!! .............. aap ko aisa kuch feel huwa tha??? Goshh!!!

meri ye na cheez aqal ab bhi apni is baat mey Wo cheez dekhnay sey qasir hey jo aap dekh rahein hein ... aap ney quote kiya tu ye bhi batana tha na ki kahan hey meri apni baatoon mey ikhtelaaf aur kahan main ney aap k baarey mey raey dee??

meri nazar mey ye aik good quality hey (or at least sometime ppl ask me to be that way) ki her baar hi apni raey dena zaroori nahi hota .. aap agree kertey hein tu kabhi aagey sey khamosh bhi hojaya karo ... ki dono ko pata hey ki baat aisi aisi hey tu phir kehnay ka faeda! ... ye baat kuch baar log mujhey kehtey hein : ) isi leye me ney kaha bhi tha ki am learning to be like this ... ab is mey aisa kiya tha ye aap hi bata dein plz.

aap ney aik baar nahi kaee baar kaafi Hatmi raaey dee hey meray baarey mey idhar : )

Jo meanings main ne samjhaye hain....Aur jo meanings aap ne samjhaee...dono main actually baat yehi chuppi hai jo aap ne black main kahii...!!Hamaray deen ne hamain Uthtay Bethnay...Khanay peenay...Roz marrah ki zindagi k adaab tu sikhaaye hi hain....Lekin ikhlaq wo adab hai jis ka taluq hamari zaban aur hamaray expressions se hai....so...Ap ne actually yehi kaha tha jissay aap samajh kar bhi na samajh paaee...!!

+1 EXP

[AQN]

Main ne apni koshish Tamam kardi...Ager aap ko Samajh nahi aa raha tu I dont want to kill my time in conviencing u....!!

I back myself too ........... cz ab baat general explanation and discussion sey badh ker personal level tak aagaee hey .. n this would be the last thing I want to do ever ... so we better should quit.


thanks for giving me ur precious time which you could spend on reading stuff over here which could enhance ur knowledge n so on. : )

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